Life as we know it may end one day…It could be in 3 seconds or 3 hours. Would you have any regrets? Would you have wished you did something differently? Maybe you wanted to resolve issues that you and your best friend had or maybe you wanted to confess your feelings to that special someone.
Chances are that you probably didn’t do it because you felt that you were going to be judged or lose that person forever. We tend to look at the negative outcomes and be completely oblivious to the positive ones. What if your issues were resolved and you got your best friend back or what if that special someone reciprocated those feelings? Yes, there is a chance of both positive and negative outcomes, but you are never going to know which one you will receive until you do it. I started speaking to my mother about being judged and changing for other people, she told me that no matter how much I changed myself for the satisfaction of others I would be judged anyway.
When I was in the seventh grade I intensely thought of what other people thought of me. I was judged on my friends, the way I looked, the songs I knew, my body weight etc. Seriously I was judged by the songs I knew and how well I knew the lyrics. If I didn’t know a recent Drake song I was considered completely boring. I was even judged on the lunch I brought. I remember a situation where I had brought a grilled cheese sandwich and my friend looks at me with disgust and says “Do you need my dad to loan your parents money?” [Yep, that actually happened] I never brought a grilled cheese sandwich to school after that encounter.
That one simple sentence clicked in my brain“You will be judged anyway” for some reason I felt at ease. I no longer felt the need to change my hairstyle or bring expensive lunch to school because I would still be judged. I left the people who judged me for the person I was and made new friends and I sure was happy. I was always smiling and didn’t care what anyone thought of me. I had finally embraced my divergent personality and accepted who I was.
I finally came to the realisation that I can’t please everyone and I don’t need to, the only person who needed to accept me was…..ME
and I finally did.